Top 55 Funny Facebook Status Updates

<font color='red'>For better view and updata read this article from our new site from here : <a href="http://www.new-technology-news.net/top-55-funny-facebook-status-updates/">http://www.new-technology-news.net/top-55-funny-facebook-status-updates/</a></font><br /><br /><div class="ex"><p style="text-align: center;"><img alt="Facebook Jail" class="aligncenter" height="211" src="http://www.new-technology-news.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/facebook_jail.jpg" title="Facebook Jail" width="375"></p><p>Facebook is full of fun and enjoyment. Here I compiled the top 55 funny status updates that I fount interesting on Facebook. Taste them and share with your friends.<span id="more-22066"></span></p><p>Note : Do you have any thing that I have missed here then comment it below.</p><ol><li>When you have a flask, every hour is happy hour.</li> <li>Better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.</li> <li>Never drink water – if it can rust iron, imagine what it can do to your stomach.</li> <li>It doesn’t matter what temperature the room is. It’s always room-temperature.</li> <li>Always forgive your enemies – Nothing annoys them so much.</li> <li>When you’re right, no one remembers. When you’re wrong, no one forgets.</li> <li>Always borrow money from a pessimist.A  He won’t expect it back.</li> <li>If you can’t see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.</li> <li>Where there’s a will, there are five hundred relatives.</li> <li>Accept that some days you’re the pigeon and some days you’re the statue.</li> <li>The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there’s a 90% probability you’ll get it wrong.</li> <li>If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking, and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?</li> <li>Better to understand a little than to misunderstand a lot.</li> <li>Everyone is gifted. Some open the package sooner.</li> <li>Suburbs are areas where they cut down trees and then name the streets after them.</li> <li>Never forget a friend, especially those that owe you–Chinese Proverb</li> <li>You can’t have everything, where would you put it?</li> <li>Strangers have the best candy.</li> <li>Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, you’ll be a mile from them, and you’ll have their shoes. -Jack Handy</li> <li>If at first you DO succeed, try not to look astonished!</li> <li>When the blind leadeth the blind, get out of the way.</li> <li>Keep smiling – it makes everyone wonder what you’re up to.</li> <li>There’s always a light at the end of the tunnel…just hope it’s NOT a train!</li> <li>If it doesn’t fit, force it; if it breaks, it needed replacement anyway.</li> <li>If two wrongs don’t make a right, try three.</li> <li>Education is what you get from reading the small print. Experience is what you get from not reading it.</li> <li>Money may not buy happiness, but it sure makes misery much easier to live with.</li> <li>Whoever said money can’t buy happiness doesn’t know where to shop.</li> <li>There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can’t.</li> <li>Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking.</li> <li>Money can’t buy happiness but it can certainly rent it for a couple of hours.</li> <li>Eat drink and be merry, for tomorrow they may make it illegal.</li> <li>When in charge, ponder. When in doubt, mumble. When in trouble, delegate.</li> <li>There’s nothing more restful than taking orders from fools.</li> <li>He who laughs last didn’t get the joke.</li> <li>Why be difficult when with a bit of effort you can be impossible?</li> <li>I’d rather have Lockheed deliver the mail than ride around in a plane built by the post office.</li> <li>Time flies when you don’t know what you’re doing.</li> <li>Age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill.</li> <li>We are the people our parents warned us about.</li> <li>Love your enemies. It’ll make ‘em crazy.</li> <li>Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.</li> <li>Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.</li> <li>Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.</li> <li>He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame.</li> <li>Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.</li> <li>Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.</li> <li>Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat.</li> <li>When in doubt, mumble.</li> <li>To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.</li> <li>A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it.</li> <li>When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.</li> <li>Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.</li> <li>If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you’ll have trouble putting on your pants.</li> <li>What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer? An offer you can’t understand.</li> </ol><p><!--END--></p><div style="clear: both;"></div><div class="snap_nopreview sharing robots-nocontent"><ul><li class="sharing_label">Want to share?:</li><li class="share-email share-regular share-service-visible"><a class="share-email share-icon" href="http://www.new-technology-news.net/top-55-funny-facebook-status-updates/?share=email&nb=1" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to email this to a friend">Email</a></li><li class="share-print share-regular"><a class="share-print share-icon" href="http://www.new-technology-news.net/top-55-funny-facebook-status-updates/#print" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to print">Print</a></li><li class="share-digg share-regular"><a class="share-digg share-icon" href="http://www.new-technology-news.net/top-55-funny-facebook-status-updates/?share=digg&nb=1" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to Digg this post">Digg</a></li><li class="share-facebook share-regular"><a class="share-facebook share-icon" href="http://www.new-technology-news.net/top-55-funny-facebook-status-updates/?share=facebook&nb=1" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Share on Facebook">Facebook</a></li><li class="share-reddit share-regular"><a class="share-reddit share-icon" href="http://www.new-technology-news.net/top-55-funny-facebook-status-updates/?share=reddit&nb=1" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to share on Reddit">Reddit</a></li><li class="share-stumbleupon share-regular"><a class="share-stumbleupon share-icon" href="http://www.new-technology-news.net/top-55-funny-facebook-status-updates/?share=stumbleupon&nb=1" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to share on StumbleUpon">StumbleUpon</a></li><li class="share-twitter share-regular"><div class="twitter_button"><iframe allowtransparency="true" src="http://platform.twitter.com/widgets/tweet_button.html?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.new-technology-news.net%2Ftop-55-funny-facebook-status-updates%2F&counturl=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.new-technology-news.net%2Ftop-55-funny-facebook-status-updates%2F&count=horizontal&text=Top%2055%20Funny%20Facebook%20Status%20Updates:%20" style="width: 97px; height: 20px;" frameborder="0" scrolling="no"></iframe></div></li><li class="share-end"></li></ul><div class="sharing-clear"></div></div></div>

Top 55 Funny Facebook Status Updates

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